4 + Reasons Why a Long Engagement is Right for You

Wedding Wednesday Vol 2.
Engaged and Confused
Why my fiancé and I have decided to not discuss anything wedding for 90 days, & plan on having a long engagement.

Whoa!! Pump the brakes!! Who knew that the minute you get engaged everyone expects that you have a date already figured out?! I was shocked and a little disappointed at how much family, friends and acquaintances asked me that directly after the congratulations. My reply shocked all of them, 'for the next 90 days Nick and I have decided to just enjoy being engaged'. I could feel the disappointment. I know that the questions and tips come from a place of love and excitement, but I was beginning to feel the stress. 

The thought of having to plan a wedding really was making me anxious, and I just had gotten engaged! I didn't even have a Pinterest board dedicated to our future wedding, it was one of those moments I found myself just not planning for. I was too busy pinning outfits I could create and finding recipes.

Reason 1: Less Stress
When Nick and I sat down and discussed why this was important to us, we both realized how much on the same page were. I never want people to ask us 'how's the wedding planning going'? and we reply, stressful. I know that planning a huge event like this will involve some stress, but I just didn't want that for us. Plus, I'm a stress eater so the less stress the better :) We both decided that not talking about it was very good for our relationship!

Reason 2: Focus on you Two
The whole idea of not talking about the wedding for 90 days was for us to focus on 'US'. To bond, grow closer and learn to communicate better. I can honestly say this first month has flown by already. We've already tried multiple ways to bond better and more on that in the upcoming weeks! Growing closer won't happen over night, it's going to take time but already we've talked about some pretty heavy stuff like, family goals, home goals, life dreams. Things we briefly spoke about while dating but now we talk about the fears and how we can get there together. We both have actively tried to communicate better, instead of letting things build up or just blow them off and pretend they don't bother us, we talk it out. I really recommend this book and this book

Reason 3: Lifestyle Goals
We like the lifestyle we live. We didn’t want our lifestyle to be affected just so that we could afford a wedding. Having a long engagement can allow us plenty of time to pay for our portion of the wedding, (our parents are generously contributing) and without that we don't have to change our lifestyle. We eventually plan to move, so being able to save for a down payment to a house, and pay for a wedding, and still be able to enjoy our lifestyle can leave you financially strapped. We both didn't want that, so having a longer engagement will enable us be more conscious of our finances. 

Reason 4: Celebrate Good Times
I absolutely love being engaged. It’s such an exciting time in my life and I really didn’t want it to be over so quickly. We celebrated with his family and we haven't celebrated with mine just yet, but things to look forward to. All that preparation for the big day takes a long time to plan, and will be over in 6-8 hours. Being able to celebrate little by little with all our family and friends makes this moment that much more special.We've celebrated together, have fun nights in and are still wanting to party!! Because let's be real the engagement bubble is really nice!

All you married and engaged babes out there, is this something you would do?
This post is in partnership with WeddingWire. All thoughts, writing & styling are my own. 


  1. Yes! I absolutely love this. You're so right. It sounds like this will lead to an even happier engagement and mirage for the both of you. Congratulations again!

  2. I totally agree that having a long engagement is better! Enjoy it! Every minute! 💓

  3. LOVE what you said here! My friend and I were just discussing this the other night. Such a unique post!

  4. I LOVE this article, and it's totally relatable!! My fam/friends do the same thing to me, and I'm not even engaged it!! (Been dating my bf for 7 years lolol)

  5. This is such an awesome post! I can't wait to share it with some of my girlfriends with upcoming weddings.

  6. YES girl, all of this. we had a 14 month engagement because we had a LOT of other things going on other than planning a wedding (new house, demanding jobs)... I did not want to become a bridezilla and you are right, it's all over in 6-8 hours (so be sure to splurge on a good videographer/photographer, IMO). sounds like you guys have it all figured out :)